Thursday, July 29, 2010

To the girls who are single. . .Six Major Warning Signs

This is probably the weirdest post I have ever done,and have debated back and forth whether or not I should posted. I finally decided I would because I feel like I've seen way too much heartache over broken marriages that could have been prevented if the girls had known what to watch out for. I doubt very many single girls even read my blog, but even if this saves one girl from going through a terrible relationship and marriage, it's worth it.
I would tell ANY girl these things--girlfriends, girls who are not-so-much friends. But really, I have seen too many friends who missed seeing these signs in the guys they were going to marry, or chose to overlook them because of other good qualities, and they've all ended up divorced. It's so sad for me to see. Please know that EVERY single
thing on this list is a MAJOR warning sign--some of the guys only had one of these signs before my friends married them, some had more. A broken engagement/relationship rather than a broken marriage a few years down the road. These things may even seem small, but know that any problems you have while dating usually get amplified
when you get married because you are together more time, in more situations, and the commitment is there so people feel they don't have to show their best selves all the time.

1. Anger management problems. If a guy or girl gets overly upset about things while you are dating, know it only gets worse after you get married. Even if the guy never hits you, breaking things, throwing things, yelling, and making you feel guilty over little things are severe forms of emotional abuse. Even little things adding up over the years can become exhausting to deal with. Abuse usually escalates with marriage, marriage does not decrease it.

2. Family has a bad feeling about the guy/girl. It's one thing if your family doesn't like your chosen one because they are from a lower economic class or not as educated or something. Then it's really up to you to decide. But if your family has a bad feeling about someone, PLEASE listen to the warning signs. Especially if your siblings don't like him. I know it's easy to disagree with parents about things because they are overly concerned about us, but families can really tell things that someone that is emotionally attached can't. I've known families that had bad feelings about the person their son/daughter was going to marry, and after they are married the spouse has discovered major infidelity, abuse, or dishonesty. Our own emotions can confuse what we think are spiritual promptings. Take the opinions of your close family members into serious consideration

3. Pornography. This one is kind of a "duh". Major run-away sign. Repentance is possible, but you want to be considering a relationship with someone after this problem is long in the past, if it was

4. Selfishness. Your spouse or spouse-to-be should be more concerned about your happiness than their own. This is tricky, because obviously you want your spouse or spouse to be happy, but he/she should be the same way. If they are always making you feel guilty for not thinking about them first, major warning sign. This one can also take years to add up to the point where you can't take it anymore, but it can and does add up. I've seen this come out in different ways, from not sharing money with a spouse when it was desperately needed to demanding all the time and attention that the spouse has.

5. Unrighteous dominion. A guy should not be pressuring you to marry him because of his "revelation" or "promptings", or really anything for that matter. You shouldn't feel pressured into getting married, or made feel guilty enough to go along with it. You should genuinely want to be with that person and feel completely free to make that decision.

"No power or influence can or ought to be maintained by virtue of the priesthood, only by persuasion, by long-suffering, by gentleness and meekness, and by love unfeigned; By kindness, and pure knowledge, which shall greatly enlarge the soul without hypocrisy, and without guile—That they may be conferred upon us, it is true; but when we undertake to cover our sins, or to gratify our pride, our vain ambition, or to exercise control or dominion or compulsion upon the souls of the children of men, in any degree of unrighteousness, behold, the heavens withdraw themselves; the Spirit of the Lord is grieved; and when it is withdrawn, Amen to the priesthood or the authority of that man".

If a guy/girl makes you feel obligated to do things, or guilty if you don't, that is unrighteous dominion. You should NEVER marry someone because they make you feel obligated to do so. Marriage should be given freely, without compulsion. I don't care if it's five minutes before the marriage ceremony--you should still feel free to walk out if you don't feel right about it and not obligated to follow through. Until you say "yes", you are COMPLETELY free to change your mind.

6. Very possessive or jealous. If your significant other is upset when you talk to, or study with, or sit in class by members of the opposite gender, that is a major warning sign. People who are possessive before marriage are usually abusive during marriage.

That's it folks. Take it or leave it.

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Beagle Puppies Soon to arrive.



The Bowles love us so much that they want us to have the experience of taking care of a really large mommy Beagle as well as help her in the delivery process! I have no idea what to expect, I have heard alot of drama and hope that this is a positive experience rather than one that will leave me forever traumatized. At least Sunny spends her days on the cool tiles in an AC room with no toddlers torturing her all day long. I don't think that I am grown up and mature enough to deliver puppies, and I just hope that I don't pass out when they arrive. Let me know if you are interested in a new fun summer surprise! Visit the blog for more info! Thanks
http://beagleobsession.blogspot.com/

Beagle

Happy Pioneer Day!

We had such a great time with the Reynolds this year! We had some time to catch up and even got to blow grandma's up with fireworks too! Interesting adoption update if you want to check the story on our other blog! see http://bradandjessadoptionblog.blogspot.com/. Really Brad has some great friends and I am not completely against the idea of moving up to Utah again, if it wasn't for the snow and stupid members up in P-Town. The Reynold family are a bunch of graduated BYU football players, some of which have gone pro ball. Imagine these HUGE guys launching works into the air! So funny. One work hit the nearby field and ignited it on fire which was stomped out. I could think of worse things then fireman showing up! Brad burnt his had when attempting a throw that he dropped right in front of the Grandmas and me. The boys took off running and left us to be singed when it exploded at our feet! It is so surprising to me how big the holiday is up in Utah. Parades everywhere, rodeo's sold out, and firworks all over the valley.
With Winger's wings, some time to see the family, and painting all day the trip flew by! We had a great time! Thanks Olsen's!

Michelle's home has decided to explode with water and grow mold everywhere. Dang washer machine. She hasn't been able to live in her home for weeks now. No bathroom or kitchen. Really it was time for an update and we are so excited for a new start and a clean floor with no poisonous mold! We spent the weekend picking out carpet samples, tiles, and paint swatches. Saturday was spent painting the rooms that will be replaced with the new carpet as well as new black furniture. Really, it will be so nice when all the drama and lame insurance companies are finished!


Happy Pioneer Day!

We had such a blast on our little weekend jaunt up to Provo. Really the drive will kill me one of these days. And don't even think about throwing kids into the equation. I have no idea how people do that drive with babies! Brad's family had a Olsen reunion this year up in Park city area at Uncle Phils cabin. I was such a dork intoducing myself like no one had ever met me, when in truth most were at the reception. I finally stopped speaking after the " oh we've met you a couple times before!" Really the wedding line was a blur. Anyways, the food was great and it was so beautiful just hanging out on the porch chatting.




Peter Piper Pizza

The Bowles treated Kels and I to a lunch with the girls at the piper. Really the pizza wasn't as bad as I remembered. The girls had their piggy bank full of change and had a great time riding the rides. They are getting to such a fun age where they are more aware of the surroundings and can have fun.



Tuesday, July 6, 2010

San Diego, Happy 4th of July

We had such a great time on the beach this year on Cornado Island. Brook had a blast and it was the same 12 people in one condo situation again. We rode bikes around the island and got to see a HUGE carrier leave port, we played tennis and I won 2:1 against Brad. We saw the new twilight at gas lamp and hit the pool and beach everyday. It was relaxing and Brad was glad to be cool in the amazing weather where we could play all day. I am grateful for the freedoms we have to enjoy and all that has and will be sacrificed to remain free. We are so blessed and have no reason to complain....that is unless Obama takes everything we hold sacred from us. Until then we will celebrate and have a lot of fun!. u



San Diego, Happy 4th of July





Katie and Josh. June 26th 2010





Katie and Josh. June 26th 2010





Hollywood, CA





Hollywood, CA

Dr. Phils house in Hollywood. And the owner of Aldo's on Rodeo's car. They have so much money its not even funny.



Hollywood, CA